Destiny & the Deepest Part of Me


Astrological charts are wheels in which the stars and planets are dispersed with the appearance that the Earth is at the center. It appears that everything is revolving around us, but of course, it’s not. In a chart, a person’s soul is at the center of the wheel and it is my perspective that knowing one’s chart offers insight into how to navigate that center, how to find that center. I don’t think it’s necessary to remain in the center at all times. I’m not convinced that we’re here in these bodies not to experience the possible shifts and flows that can come from embodying these drives—as intense and chaotic as they can be. We all have every energy of the zodiac located in our charts in unique placements for a reason. Nonetheless, I have found that knowing my center and being able to feel into that center allows me to navigate the energies in my chart more effectively, to actually have control over my own energy, to exist fully in all of the power that resides in my mind, body, and spirit.

Every day, there are transits in an astrological chart. Every day, the Sun moves one degree in your chart. Certain transits are celebrated and emphasized—a Solar Return (aka your birthday), a Lunar Return, a Venus Return, a Saturn Return (not so much celebrated as feared). Similarly, certain points of a chart are emphasized—like the Ascendant and the Midheaven. The Midheaven, or Medium Coeli, is one of the most important points in a chart. It is the ceiling, the Sun’s highest point in the sky the day you were born. It represents Noon. It represents your highest achievement in this life. By achievement, I refer to how you’re known, your destiny, the legacy you will leave in this world. For most people, this point is located in their 10th House of Career. In traditional Hellenistic Astrology, however, whole sign houses make it possible for this point to be located in the 9th or 11th House. I use whole sign houses in my practice and, as a result, I tend to work a lot with axes throughout the chart. The Midheaven is part of an axis—an axis that I refer to as the Axis of Destiny. An axis implies that there is another point at the other end of the Midheaven … and, there is. This point is called the Imam Ceoli (IC) or the Nadir. Imam Coeli means the bottom of the sky—literally, the bottom of the chart. This point is referenced regularly, but rarely discussed—partially because it is so deep that it can be invisible to a person in themself, let alone to other people.

In my own life and in my practice, I have found that exploring the depths of the IC is necessary to understand how to reach the Midheaven. How can a tree grow if it has no roots? It can’t … and it can be a confusing part of a chart. The Sun has also been transiting my IC over the past week, as it does each year. Year in and year out, I find this transit to be one of the most difficult of the year—perhaps because it falls in my chart on the Taurus/Scorpio axis. I will write more about this axis in my post about the Full Moon in Scorpio, due to grace us with its presence tomorrow.

I’m not even sure how to write about this place, this space inside of me, my IC. My IC is in Taurus—fixed Earth—and as this point is transited, my whole being wants to be rooted in the Earth – like being at the beach with my whole body buried except for my head. It’s not so much about being buried, though, as it is about wanting and needing to be held in all of the ways in which a person can be held—physically, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually. Not just touched, but held, and held by something and someone whose energy is solid, grounded, slow, steady, someone who doesn’t let go or, at least, who doesn’t let go quickly. It is a desire to be held by someone who or something that holds just to hold, not expecting anything, not looking for anything in return, not wanting to possess, not looking for an association externally granted. I am looking for the Earth, who simply holds the roots of a plant, of a tree, so it can grow. The Earth’s job is to be fertile, to be a space in which something can grow. Its only responsibility is to be moist, nutrient dense, and at this time of the year, warm. Whether something grows or doesn’t is none of its business, none of its responsibility, none of its concern, comes as neither a benefit nor a detriment. And yet, it holds, it cradles, it nurtures life.

This thing that I want every year at this time—this is not my destiny. It’s just the deepest part of me. In fact, my destiny is to become something very different. My destiny, in fact, is to let go, to learn how to let go, to transform, to transmutate, to be an alchemist, to penetrate the depths of my own psyche further than I ever thought possible. And when I think I have gone as far as I can go, to go a little further, a little bit deeper. Through this experience of deep exploration into my own psychic landscape, my chart indicates that I am also called to offer other people tools to do the same. That is Scorpio. That is what Scorpio is about. That is what is happening with this Full Moon rising—the psyche is being stirred.

My IC is in my 5th House of love, pleasure, beauty, creativity, leisure, and pleasure, whereas most people’s IC’s are in their 4th House of Home—house, family, ancestry, foundation, roots. This means that where I began is not where I will return. This means that I am meant to become something different than that into which I was born. I am meant to find roots rather than return to them. It means that the deepest parts of me might appear even more invisible than they do with most people unless I know them and illuminate them. It also means that all of the psychic exploration, all of the transformation, transmutation, and penetration can’t happen without that cradle of creativity, without beauty, without love, and without pleasure.

Where is your IC? What do you need to make your destiny a reality? Do you know? Are you ready to go there? To sit still and quietly in the one place where you want to be held where no one can hold you but the earth? But god? But whatever it is that you believe in that is greater than you? It’s a hard one … but it’s one of the most important ones to truly visit. Don’t just let it pass. Let it in … and then, like this Moon is telling us, let it go.

If you are interested in learning more about the IC in your own chart, please contact me for a reading at HilaryB130@gmail.com or via Social Media @HilaryB130.

Published by: hilaryb130

I am an explorer and healer seeking to bridge healing and liberation between the minds, bodies and spirits of individuals, communities and the planet through creative writing, art, music and poetry. I am dedicated to bringing about a more peaceful and just world through my research about the intersections of healing modalities, consciousness/spirituality, liberation theories and creative/aesthetic practice. Environmental Studies PhD.

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